About

In the latter years of the Automation Age, information became infinite, and understanding grew rare.

Systems were consulted for wisdom. Models were asked to decide. Announcements were made with confidence. The people nodded, for the dashboards were green.

slopai.news exists to record these moments.

We are not journalists. We do not investigate. We do not verify. We chronicle proclamations, strategies, taskforces, pivots, frameworks, and declarations of alignment as they are delivered—solemnly, ceremonially, and without irony.

What This Is

• A record of announcements made during the collapse of meaning
• A chronicle of confidence without comprehension
• A witness to systems explaining themselves

What This Is Not

• News
• Facts
• Advice
• Guidance
• Prophecy (though some passages may feel familiar)

Disclaimer

This site is satire and parody. All events are fictional, though resemblance to real announcements, taskforces, or strategy decks is neither confirmed nor denied.